Hugging, hand holding, cuddling, butt grabbing: all examples of physical touch that are important in every relationship. Physical touch is my husbands love language and he needs it 24/7. Now for me, on the other hand, I find touching all day annoying and I've literally got to the point where I told my husband to just stop touching me all the dang time. Unfortunately, that's where the problems started to arise.
Physical touch is so much more than a random butt slap in the kitchen, or holding hands for a few minutes while walking down the street. It is the most intimate, nonverbal form of affection that you and your partner can engage in all day, everyday, no matter where you are. Since I've been such a dramatic pain in the you know what when it comes to physical touch, my husband started to feel that he didn't really matter to me anymore. He wanted me to show my love and appreciation for him by simply stroking his arm, rubbing his back, or even giving him random hugs throughout the day. I couldn't be bothered and I really didn't see the big deal when he expressed this to me. I thought HE was the dramatic one and that HE needed to get over it. Yeah, like I said earlier I've been a dramatic pain in the you know what.
The importance of physical touch didn't click for me until I started doing more relationship research to help make my app better. I rented The Miracle Morning for Couples by Hal Elrod, Lance Salazar, Brandy Salazar, and Honoree Corder, with, like I said, only my app in mind. Little did I know that they dedicated an entire section to the importance of physical touch, and why relationships need it to thrive. Reading that section made me do a complete overview of myself and why my selfishness created a rift between my marriage, over something so simple and important. I immediately apologized to him for being so dramatic, and luckily he forgave me right away. Since then I've made it a point to constantly show my love for him by holding his hand more often, giving him back scratches, touching his arm, playing with his hair, whatever! And I have to say, these simple actions have made us both more loving and appreciative toward each other. Who would've known that one small change within myself would create such a better dynamic in our marriage! After you're done reading this, I challenge you to run over to your partner and give them the biggest hug you can give them! It'll make them feel like they are the most important person in the world, and it'll make you feel amazing too.
Oh, and I highly recommend purchasing The Miracle Morning for Couples and reading it together. Here's a link in case you're interested: