Jason didn't put the dishes away, AGAIN! I buried his favorite hat under piles of clothes, AGAIN! Face it guys, we've all been there. We all have wanted to strangle our partner for not listening to our simple requests that we have had to repeat over and over again. But since strangling each other is frowned upon, we decide to vent to our friends. I vent about how dirty my wonder(pain in the ass)ful husband is, and he vents about how annoying(ly awesome) I am. We're both simply getting out things that are frustrating us, and it's really no big deal...until one of our vent sessions finally turns into badmouthing and becomes a big deal. And then we have to deal with the consequences, while wishing we never said anything in the first place. So here are my top three reasons why you should NEVER cross the line and badmouth your partner:
1. Badmouthing your partner opens the door to allow others to badmouth as well. Oh, you're just venting that they don't keep the house clean? Well now those you just vented to will say something negative about your partner the next time you talk to them. Or even worse, they will feel that they can run to the next person and say something terrible about your partner because you just said something terrible about them. And they won't ever think they did anything wrong because, let's face it, you just spent the last hour badmouthing the. See how terrible that cycle is?
2. One way or another, your partner will find out that you were talking about them. Yeah, anything and everything you say to your friends will spread. No matter how much you trust your friends, I am telling you that word will spread and your partner will find out, and that will crush them. Don't allow a friend of a friend to be the one who tells your love what you said about them.
3. Badmouthing makes your relationship look weak. You're not that rock solid couple who will be together until the end anymore, you're that couple who's only "together because it's convenient but they really don't want to be with each other." Have you ever thought that about someone else before? I know I have! I've had friends who constantly talk crap about each other and I just feel that their relationship isn't real and that it just needs to end already. It makes the relationship look forced, fake, and that their bond is held together by expired Jell-O.
Don't get me wrong, you're going to have those days where you want to vent so badly about something annoying your significant has done. I'm telling you now, DON'T DO IT! Instead write down your frustrations on a piece of paper, have a mini vent session to yourself in the privacy of your own car (you'll look crazy but at least you'll feel better), or even vent to your pet! Just don't do it to anyone else anymore, and you won't have anything to worry about when it comes to hurting your partner over these badmouthing sessions.